Cymraeg » Dansk » Deutsch » Español » Français » Hrvatski » Italiano » Nederlands » Polski » Português » Русский »
Site last updated: August 30th, 2010



Hip Pains

Where posturing postmodern populists gather to expose themselves...

"For in their own, unpretentious way, Rodgers and Hammerstein have done more to engender a love of music than anything written by Mahler or Beethoven."

A clueless Michael Simkins, in the Daily Telegraph (August)

* * * * *

"Listen closely, and you realize that gifted pop producers routinely turn out sophisticated orchestrations that surpass the reckonings of avant-garde prophets like Busoni, Varèse and Stockhausen."

Not very critical critic Stevie Smith, guffing in the New York Times (August)

* * * * *

"Of course, it speaks volumes about the inaccessibility and exclusivity of classical music concerts hitherto that this [clapping between movements] can even be an issue. [...] This year [at the BBC Proms] that arcane barrier has been broken down. The much sought-after new audience seems to have arrived."

Hapless Voice of the People David Lister, critic in The Independent (July)

"Thank all that is holy: it seems as if the fatuous snobbery of not clapping after any movement as proof of holier-than-thou cognoscenti-dom may be becoming a thing of the past."

Blog entry by fatuous anti-snob and holier-than-thou incognoscento Tom Service, musoc.org's residential Hip Pain (July)

See also Clap Them (In Irons)

* * * * *

"Or do we think - and let's be honest about this - that classical music is more difficult than nonclassical stuff, that it requires special knowledge and long experience, and that therefore a classical musician can judge a pop nomination [for the Pulitzer Prize] without knowing anything about pop, while a rock critic could never, never, never judge a classical piece. I think that's bigoted, myself."

Blog entry by Greg Sandow, self-declared music clairvoyant (July)

* * * * *

"Prom 49 [...] a glorious romp through the songs of Rodgers & Hammerstein's hit shows, with a starry line-up of soloists, including Kim Criswell"

One of the "4 Unmissable Proms" (alongside Mahler, Monteverdi & Wagner) of Ivan Hewett, Daily Telegraph music critic (July)

* * * * *

"He [Roger Wright]'s broadening the scope of the thing to such an extent that he seems [...] to be bringing to life the overall meaning of the word "music" - which is that there is no such thing as popular music, classical music, or any other genre, there is only good and bad music, and that's decided by the general public."

Denby Richards, Editor Emeritus of Musical Opinion, quoted (misquoted, surely?!) in The Independent (July)

* * * * *

"I think he [Sondheim]'s the master of modern music theatre, the continuation of a line stretching back to Handel, Mozart and Richard Strauss. Hearing Bryn Terfel and Maria Friedman sing Sondheim's brilliant settings of his own immaculately crafted, crisp text will be sheer pleasure."

Petroc 'Squire' Trelawny, BBC Radio 3 & BBC Proms presenter, drooling in The Independent over the upcoming 'Sondheim at 80' Proms (July)

More Hip Pains

Comments & Queries

You can comment on any article or feature on this site at any time by emailing gro.cosum@srettel. Musoc.org may publish your comments (either on the Letters page or elsewhere); if you want to keep them private, please mark your email 'Not for Publication'.

Some recent Readers' Letters:


Media Muppets

Glamorous young violinist Diana Yukawa, "hailed as the next Vanessa-Mae", quoted just before her BBC Proms debut: "I don't do classical music on the violin. I write my own stuff and its very modern. [...] I want to show that the violin can have a really modern fun sound. I think image is important. When you give a performance it's not just how you play but how you look - people want to see a show."

+ + + + +

Myleene Klass, vacuous-ubiquitous presenter of media industry bashes and 'reality' TV shows: "So many people are finding classical music because of these ['reality' TV] shows. This is a new generation that is coming to it and the power of these shows has to be acknowledged."

Vote Anti-Pop

Sick of hearing Pop 'Music' wherever you go? Wish you could switch it all off? Wish Art Music would get the same exposure? If you agree with musoc.org's arguments (see the FAQ), why not add your voice to the Anti-Pop and help musoc.org try to change things.

Not sure? Read what the experts say about musoc.org in Rave Reviews.

Donkey Gongs

An occasional series of awards to music snobs, those self-important asses who bray publicly at composers, musicians and music they (and their club) deem unworthy of critical or listener attention. Recent Gongs:

Igor Toronyi-Lalic, ubiquitous hawker of trendy opinion & editor of The Arts Desk (writing in same): "I struggle with Shostakovich when he is in this unrelentingly suffocating mood [the First Cello Concerto]. I fail to understand why we must be put through it. It reminds me of those horrid, exploitative Gaspar Noé films that force you to sit through every last detail of, for example, a grisly rape. It's miserablist torture porn in my view: self-indulgent, teenage, the Nirvana of classical music."

Ought-to-know-better conductor John Eliot Gardiner (before a BBC Radio 3 audience): "Why Vivaldi is hugely popular always slightly baffles me because I think he's a rather boring composer compared with Bach".

Critic David Nice (writing for The Arts Desk): "Mind you, I admit I was in a bit of a torpor after having to sit through the Korngold Violin Concerto for the second time this year, and dreading that utterly superfluous second movement when the first has said it all - and again, and again - in terms of romantic lyricism."

Alex Ross (critic for The New Yorker): "Wilhelm Furtwängler's Piano Quintet [...] is an immensely earnest mishmash of Brahms, Franck, Bruckner, and Reger, full of unmemorable ideas developed at unrelenting length."

More Donkeys

Archived

Classical GIT Awards 2010 (May 10)

"A Spectre Is Haunting Croatia - The Spectre of Crossover", by A. Gavrilović (March 10)

Blang Blang (March 10)

Objective (February 10)

Faut Pas (January 10)

B Listers (January 10)

See the Archive for a full list.


Hall of Shame

Musoc.org names & shames* those institutions and individuals who debase art music in the name of populism, philistinism or lucre. (*If only.)

Class.Traitor of the Month for September is 'classical' critic of The Arts Desk (and a dozen other anxious-for-hip-writers publications in the UK) Igor Toronyi-Lalic, for one of the most knuckleheaded, pathetically-desperate-to-say-something-outrageous descriptions of an art music work ever written - likening listening ('under duress') to Shostakovich's First Cello Concerto to "miserabilist torture porn" and watching a "grisly rape".

See also Donkey Gongs below right.


Beyond Sandow's Ken

July » A great deal continues to be written on the future of art music, often along the alarmist lines much beloved of Norman Lebrecht, one of the numerous arts journalists who think predicting the demise of an aspect of culture which has been trampled on by neoliberal forces for more than half a century is somehow tantamount to insightful writing. In his blog ("Greg Sandow on the future of classical music"), Greg Sandow (who else) has made a fine art of it (using the postmodernist 'anything goes' definition of art).

In one of his latest entries he quotes in full what he calls the 'Manifesto' of a musical chum of his, Ken Nielsen, whose "corporate background [for confectionery-makers Mars, no less] helps make him [...] impatient with solutions for classical music that aren't entrepreneurial."

Intrigued by this billing half as much as musoc.org was? Then read on!

What happened, it seems, was that over lunch one day (which is how these things usually happen), Ken gave Greg not only his Manifesto, but also his permission to reproduce it on his blog...The salient fact here is that Greg, self-declared clairvoyant and doyen of American musical postmodernism, "love[s] every bit of it" and proclaims it "far healthier than anything I've yet seen the industry come up with."

It is, of course, very unlikely that any self-respecting member of the public with an interest in art music would advertently read anything in an Arts Journal blog (home to both Sandow and Lebrecht, and existing, like much in American academia, purely for its own self-aggrandisement), but many of the same do quite naturally read musoc.org; and for that reason, the Manifesto - despite its skull-splitting banality, and despite the fact that it's not really a manifesto in any normal sense of the word - is reproduced below...without the explicit permission of Ken or Greg, it has to be said, but with the blessing of the spirit of copyright law. And a few added pointers...

"1. The classical music industry is in decline, with an aging audience base and a low rate of new audience entry."

That 'classical music' is an "industry", rather than an art form, would presumably come as quite a surprise to the thousands of composers who have seen themselves as artists producing art rather than industry workers producing, well, products.

"2. Governments, compulsory music education or any other external action will not solve the problem."

This is, of course, the exact opposite of musoc.org's position...On the other hand, musoc.org would be very happy to see the back of the "classical music industry". [Thinks: "Farewell, Warner! Farewell, Classic FM!"]

"3. To reverse this, the industry should change to make its product more attractive and accessible. Currently, there are elements that make concerts forbidding and inaccessible to new entrants."

There are, of course, elements that make pop concerts forbidding to new entrants. Some of these are, curiously, identical to those vexing Ken and Greg, such as costume (tight trousers, short skirts, dubious haircuts), expense (opera is widely cheaper in many cases) and, ahem, impenetrable repertoire. And then there's the ear-splitting amplification; and the lingering smell of sweat and marijuana.

"4. These changes need not be (and in my opinion should not be) to the music, with one exception, mentioned next."

It's true that the Mars Bar didn't get where it is today by becoming a bag of boiled sweets.

"5. More new music should be introduced to concerts. Any art form that does not renew itself will become moribund. Because elements of the current audience are so conservative, a greater variety of concerts and formats, aimed at different audiences, is probably necessary. Stick with the current stuff for the olds, offer innovation to those excited by it."

"Probably necessary", and, in truth, started happening some time around the French Revolution.

It's hard to imagine a more conservative audience than one prepared to 'listen' for two hours to the same bland, repetitious, formulaic thumpings, whinings or thrashings of a 'dance', pop or rock gig. The "current stuff" that most "olds" like is pop (from the 1950s and 60s, for example).

As for the first 'point': how can Baroque art, for example, renew itself? How can 19th century music ever be anything else but 19th century music? All 14th century art has been 'moribund' for 600 years - but it can still be studied and marvelled at...without renewing itself!!

"6. Changes to the format and style of concerts should be tried - everything from getting players out of penguin suits to the length of concerts. Concert models that have worked elsewhere should be tried. In this area, as in most areas of business, change comes about not from strategy meetings but from innovation - new things being tried, some failing, some succeeding. Such innovation, and the risks that come with it would probably be itself attractive to a different audience. "Are you game to come and hear this just composed work?"

If ever a strategy was designed to strike back against neoliberal cultural hooliganism, this surely is it! "Are you game to come and hear this just composed work?" Phew - no wonder Sandow is enthusiastic!

"7. I believe that greater engagement with and involvement of the audience is an important part of the puzzle. A concert should be more like communication than a one-sided speech."

Ah, but what to do about all those people who insist on going to art galleries and museums to one-sidedly look at exhibits, not to mention their propensity for one-sidedly watching plays and one-sidedly reading books? And then, what to do about speeches themselves - a very one-sided art form?

"8. Such changes as I am suggesting must be tried at the level of the organisation - the orchestra, opera company or whatever - others can watch and steal the ideas if they work but an industry wide approach is doomed."

Wait a minute...if an "industry-wide approach is doomed", then what is the reflective reader to make of 3. above, that: "the industry should change to make its product more attractive and accessible"?

But then Arts Journal probably doesn't get enough reflective readers to make such rambling, self-contradictory guff very noticeable.

You can respond to this article at any time by emailing gro.cosum@srettel. See right for details.

Comments: See "Unsurpassed Sandow", Letters, July 2010

NB: Further evidence in a similar vein of the sheer fatuousness of Sandow's rhetoric can be found in Heather Mac Donald's entertaining trashing of Sandow's over-the-top, postmodern-cheerleader critique of her recent article, Classical Music's New Golden Age.

BBC Radio 3: Public Consultation Response

August » As part of its campaigning intention, musoc.org finds it appropriate to respond to (rare) public consultations of the sort currently underway at the BBC Trust, namely a review of the service provided by BBC Radio 3 (and Radios 4 & 7).

It goes without saying that the Trust has an obligation only to read all suggestions and opinions offered up by the public, not actually to act upon any. Nevertheless, musoc.org urges anyone who cares about the future of art music - not just in the UK, but worldwide - to submit their opinions to the Trust (it may only take 10 minutes). Closing date is August 26th.

Meanwhile, many subscribers to Anti-pop, as well as other correspondents, are listeners (often longstanding) of BBC Radio 3, and on that basis musoc.org has submitted its own set of responses. Whilst the opinions offered (see below) are not necessarily those of all or any of musoc.org's supporters, they will be broadly representative; moreover, they will undoubtedly be more critical than any entertained by Friends of Radio 3, whose campaigning position is inevitably mitigated by its broad-church membership.

The questions that follow are those to which musoc.org has replied.

+ + + + + + +

Q3: Radio 3's main role is to broadcast high quality classical music ranging from the great composers to more exploratory work, with an emphasis on live and specially recorded music. How well do you think Radio 3 does this?

A. The station does this pretty well on the whole, though it seems blithely unaware that there are thousands more great composers outside the institutionally controlled 'standard repertoire'. Similarly there are hundreds of living composers negelected by Radio 3 whose music is of a sufficiently high quality to be broadcasted (indeed, championed) by the station.

Q4: Radio 3 also includes other styles of music such as jazz and world music. What do you think about this programming on Radio 3?

A. Unequivocally, it shouldn't be played on Radio 3 at all. One thousand years of art music deserves and needs a station all to itself - it shouldn't have to share it with anything.

Q5: What do you think about the range of music played on Radio 3?

A. It could be far greater. There is very little Early (pre-Baroque) music or music composed in the late 20th and 21st centuries, and almost no genuine folk music.

However, to repeat, there should be no jazz, pop, musical theatre or world music whatsoever.

Q6: What do you think of Radio 3's speech based programming which includes drama, arts and religion?

A. It's broadly praiseworthy, but it shouldn't be on Radio 3 - Radio 4 broadcasts much similar material already, and that's where the rest of it belongs.

Q7: Radio 3 features performances by the BBC orchestras and BBC Singers. What do you think of these performances on Radio 3?

A. These are generally of a high standard.

Q8: Radio 3 should help build appreciation of music and culture, particularly amongst people with little knowledge of classical music. How well do you think it does this?

A. It doesn't do this at all. Its various and continuous attempts at striking a 'populist' note alienate many (if not all) of those that aren't novices, which is, historically, the vast majority of the station's listenership.

Radio 3 can't educate like this on its own; there needs to be a concerted and sustained effort right across the BBC (including TV and online) to counteract the portrayal and projection of culture by all those media in competition with the BBC (and by the mass media in general).

Q9: What do you think of Radio 3's website?

It could be worse, but it should be far better - with more information, fewer space-filling graphics, more BBC-originated information, less lazy linking to Wikipedia, and stricter fact-checking (the recent hyperlinking of the 19th century composer Engelbert Humperdinck to a biography of the 1960s pop crooner (who borrowed the former's name) being a case in point). It could also be soberer or less 'postmodern' - e.g. not plastered with photos of inanely-grinning presenters or written in juvenile-friendly language.

Q11: Is there anything else you want to say about Radio 3?

A. Above all, Radio 3 should be a broadcaster of art music and nothing else. Its demeanour should be more serious, less middle-brow. It should seek out new management not obsessed with patronising populism, and more knowledgeable presenters, replacing those complicit in the ongoing dumbing-down (particularly Sean Rafferty, Petroc Trelawny, Rob Cowan, Sarah Walker, Sara Mohr-Pietsch, Katie Derham, Suzy Klein & Lucie Skeaping).

It could and should be a globally unique station, not a ragbag of programming afraid to acknowledge the historical importance and cultural high ground of what it broadcasts.

You can respond to this article at any time by emailing gro.cosum@srettel. See right for details.


Birthday Blues

June » It's been a year already since musoc.org burst (all right, 'slunk') onto the scene and the internet's cultural illuminati saw red (as in blood, not socialism!).

Although musoc.org has undergone a minor facelift and a little bit of surgery since those first days - one or two features have disappeared, a paragraph rephrased here and there - nothing much has changed in the world at large. In fact, culturally things have probably - in fact, undoubtedly - got worse.

Last week, for example, BBC Radio 3's ragbag and pointless 'Classical Collection' programme, presented by the equally pointless Sarah Walker, opened ludicrously with one of The Beatles' countless banal pop ditties. Now while it's true that the BBC may well reciprocate with a Schubert song sung by Fischer-Dieskau on Radio 1, 2 or 6, you can be sure it won't happen until there's been a global nuclear holocaust leaving playlists in the hands of mutated cockroaches and the sun has swollen to a red giant.

Leaving aside that epitome of crass/mass culture, the FIFA World Cup finals (whose non-existent relationship was trendily ignored in a cretinous BBC Music article) other predictable but nevertheless depressing current stories include the massive media coverage and eulogisation of the Glastonbury (UK) pop festival: if ever anyone doubted the brainwashing potential of media hype, they need only survey the boozed-up tens of thousands, penned in like sheep at market at their own considerable expense, bawling along word-perfectly to the puerile gibberish of their preening pop idols on distant stages. As Richard Godwin dribbled in the London Evening Standard: "He ['Snoop Dogg', former drugs and firearm felon] seems to be a family entertainer, too - I stood next to a nine-year-old girl holding mum's hand and jiggling to the chorus 'I just wanna f**k you'".

Or the US Library of Congress's announcement of the latest 25 recordings it will preserve in its archives for their 'cultural significance'. Alongside a single piece of art music were numerous items of pop dross (some, like Willie Nelson, beggaring belief), including a virtually illiterate 'song' by one of hiphop's leading thugs, Tupac Shakur.

So it goes. As for decades now, the marketing machinery and sociopolitical homogenisation of postmodern capitalism have thundered on, unswayed by war, environmental disaster or political sleaze. Art music, and art for art's sake, fit poorly into the shiny plastic world of cultural relativism.

So it is that musoc.org is really still only at the beginning of its undertaking to record the cultural vandalism inflicted on society in the name of neoliberalism, to criticise all those who participate in it (not just the obvious delinquents like the Classic FMs, the Warner Musics and the Alex Rosses, but also the likes of BBC Radio 3, Gramophone magazine, Lang Lang and numerous big-name critics), and to campaign for change.

Musoc.org would like to thank all those who have shown their support so far for this generally thankless project by subscribing to the Anti-pop or otherwise by sending letters of encouragement. Please - keep reading, keep thinking.

You can respond to this article at any time by emailing gro.cosum@srettel. See right for details.


Lo-Fi

"Now call me a cynic," says Gramophone's Audio Editor Andrew Everard in the April 2010 issue, "but this [3D TV] does look like a way to snare people into buying a whole load of new equipment". He adds - cynically? (his vox pop is called 'Infidelities', after all) - that "you can be sure these are likely to be premium-price sets", and suspects that the New Wave of 3D Everything may be just another way for business to separate people from their income.

Coincidentally, right alongside his column you can read reviews on the latest must-have audio kit. There's Naim's "all-in-one wi-fi streamer" - an internet radio, basically - a snip at £1350; a Denon CD player - can play SACD too! - costing a mere £1700; and - sweet bargain! - a pair of Bowers & Wilkins speakers at £3950.

Actually, why not keep those speakers in the spare room (to impress overnighting guests), and go for the top of the Bowers & Wilkins new "flagship" range, the '800 Diamond'? True, a pair will set you back £18,500, equivalent to, say, one thousand recital/concert/opera tickets or, put another way, one and a half year's wages for the millions on the UK's statutory minimum wage...

...But come on, who doesn't own a pair of hi-fi speakers that are well over a year old and actually getting quite threadbare, or at least dusty?